Raising Gerry: A Mother’s Day Special

Melanie: [00:00:00] I'm trying to learn not to laugh, um, just so I won't embarrass him. And there are some, I'm just not with the times or know what he's talking about, so some of them I just, I can't laugh and it just kind of throws me off. I think the one 

Andrea: you can say they're not funny. Some of his jokes aren't funny, so you don't laugh at those ones.

And that's fair.

Theme: The classroom, 

Andrea: Hey, teacher besties, I am. So excited to share with you that my book, they never taught us, that is available right now. It's everything. An experienced or first year teacher needs to manage the chaos of a modern classroom, including some anecdotes to make you feel a little bit better because if there is a way that you can screw up, I've probably done it.

It also has advice on how to build trust with families, how to manage grading and lesson plans and IEPs and everything else that they never went over in your teacher prep [00:01:00] program. They never taught us. That is available everywhere right now. Hey, teacher besties. Welcome to How to Survive the Classroom.

This is our second of two very special Mother's Day episodes. Last time we had my mom on, and this time we have Jerry's mom on Melanie Toka. Melanie, thank you so much for being here. 

Melanie: Thank you for having me. 

Andrea: And this is extra special because Ms. Patoka is also an educator. 

Melanie: Yeah. 

Andrea: That's awesome. Okay, so now Ms.

Patoka, what, what do you teach and how long have you been teaching? 

Melanie: Around 10 years, I believe, and I teach fifth grade math and science. 

Andrea: Okay, awesome. So, so fun. Now, were you surprised when Jerry decided to become a teacher or was that something that you were like, he's always gonna be an educator? 

Melanie: Oh no. I was very surprised.

I never thought he would wanna be a teacher. I always thought he'd do something with sports or [00:02:00] some kind of broadcasting or something, but not a teacher. 

Andrea: Interesting broadcasting. Was that something that he talked about growing up or it was just something you thought he'd be good at? 

Melanie: No, he talked about like sports medicine.

One time he wanted to be a preacher, like his pop. But um, he's just always been good at talking and remembering a lot of facts, things like that. So that was my opinion. I thought he would be good with any kind of speaking. So to find him on here, I'm not too surprised. But with teaching, I am. Yeah. 

Andrea: On the last episode, we talked to my mom.

Um, just on the, the parenting side of things, but you also have the perspective of not only being a mom, but also being a teacher. Um, what do you think is the hardest part of balancing mom life and teacher life? 

Melanie: Well, the one thing with me is I was able to stay home with them for a while while they went to school.

So when I did go to school for teaching, they were already older. So there wasn't, I didn't feel like I missed out on a lot. [00:03:00] I think if I had taught the whole time they were younger, I would've probably missed out on a lot. But even now, being able to try and take off for things they do as an adult and though they're both living in two separate places, both of my sons, um, I think that's kind of hard.

Yeah, just coming home. I think at night I'm drained. I don't really wanna, 

Andrea: I'm sorry, my, my child. As we're talking about the difficulties of balancing mom life and working life, my son comes in wearing dragon wings and holding a shark. Hold on. The timing of that could not have been, yeah, 

Melanie: I would say that way.

Andrea: Sorry. 

Melanie: That would definitely be chasing Jerry. Yeah. In a costume. Coming in, wanting to get, get noticed. Yeah. 

Andrea: Now, was there like a specific costume that Jerry would wear as a kid? 

Melanie: I would say mostly, probably Spider-Man, between both of them. Um, but with Jerry, he [00:04:00] had tons of costumes. He's had Elvis costumes, um, pirates of the Caribbean, every.

Day after Easter, I'm, I'm sorry, not Easter, Halloween. Ooh. I don't know where I got Easter from, but we would always go shopping for clearance costumes. We would get 'em at yard sales, wherever. 'cause he loved costumes. But even today he still loves, you know, Spider-Man and the other things where he is, got his t-shirts, Marvel, um, all of those.

So he's still, it's not a whole costume, but he is still got his t-shirts. 

Gerry: I have five Spiderman within an arms length of me right now. 

Melanie: Let's see him. Jerry, 

Andrea: bring him out. Five 

Gerry: different Spiderman. One. No, I 

Andrea: was gonna say, yep. 

Gerry: 2, 3, 4. 

Andrea: Oh my gosh. Five. Wow. You were not exaggerating at all. Incredible for any 

Melanie: of them.

Gerry: The one gang 

Andrea: had 

Melanie: from my [00:05:00] child. You still have those? No. 

Gerry: I lost them all. 

Andrea: You lost them? 

Gerry: Yeah. I didn't, I didn't think they were, I thought they were cool, but I didn't know they was gonna be like they was gonna come back around. 

Andrea: Right. You didn't know you were gonna be in, in your twenties and still buying Spider-Man dolls.

Gerry: Yeah. I also didn't know I'd be hosting a podcast, somebody who don't mind their own business, who bullies me. 

Andrea: Surprise, surprise. 

Gerry: There are so many things I could be doing. I don't think buying Spider-Man. It's the, it's the worst one. 

Andrea: You know what? You're right. You're absolutely right. Now, Jerry, do you remember dressing up as Spider-Man as a kid?

Gerry: I couldn't remember if a Spider-Man was me or my brother. One that I remember is one year, uh, is one year at Halloween. My mom went to Charlotte to go find like, like, uh, costumes. And that year I wanted to be the situation from Jersey Shore. It was the worst costume that I ever [00:06:00] probably landed on, like the most wildest one.

Yeah. She gets stopped at like Planet H, what they call it, planet Halloween. Spirit Halloween. And they stop her, interview her, and they're like, yeah, my youngest son, he wants to be a zombie. My oldest son, he wants to be the situation from Jersey Shore. And this went on tv. 

Andrea: No way. I 

Gerry: remember that. I was built like I'm built right now.

Like I was just smaller. There was a situation. All right. 

Andrea: I love it. Now, Melanie, did you know who this, this situation was from Jersey Shore. Were you, did you watch that show at all? 

Melanie: I didn't watch it, but I mean, you couldn't help but know who they were, but bringing him, mentioning it up right now, I remember being interviewed, but I didn't remember that that was the costume, but yeah.

Oh yeah. That was probably one of his worst choices. 

Andrea: Yeah. Now, when you went to parent-teacher [00:07:00] conferences, when Jerry was growing up. Do you remember any in particular that stand out? I mean, what did the teachers say about him? Was he a, you know, a young scholar? 

Melanie: I don't know if he was a scholar, but they loved him.

All of his teachers loved him, and, you know, they still talk about him. Um, I know one has passed away now, but she has talked about him up until, you know, the last time I talked to her. They've all loved him. Um, nothing ever bad to say. 

Gerry: Ooh. 

Melanie: Miss Cato, Ms. Made. Oh yeah. Now some of the high school teachers, they just knew how he was.

So, you know, there's not a lot I can do there. And one of them, well, I don't know if you ever had Ms. Bowie, but she was a friend of mine, but she was at the school with 

Gerry: him. Yeah. She was the first one that threatened. She, and I think I, I don't know if she listens to this, but she'd be watching my stuff and she'd be talking like, like things was sweet when I was in her class.

She was the first one that ever threatened to kick me out, 

Melanie: but she knew him well, [00:08:00] so she probably had a reason. 

Theme: Yeah. 

Melanie: Yeah. Now 

Gerry: I said the book, the giver sucked. 

Melanie: Oh. 

Gerry: And she was like, well, you can leave my class. I was like, you know what? I'm good. 

Andrea: You, you said you were good, so you weren't gonna say the giver sucked anymore or you were gonna 

Gerry: Yeah.

Let's be real. Have you read The Giver? 

Andrea: I have. It's not my favorite. 

Gerry: No, it sucks. There's no like saber nothing. 

Melanie: It's wars. Yeah. 

Andrea: Yeah. Did you maybe prefer the Hatchet? I feel like that's the one that boys like, 

Gerry: oh, there was that one. 

Andrea: The Hatchet. It's, it's about this like, I don't know. I think he's like 11, 12 years old.

He does have a hatchet and his, he's got like a, he is going to visit like I think his dad in Alaska or something, and the twinge and Cessna that he was in crashes and he has to survive with just a hatchet. Whoa. Um, and like middle school boys are all about that, that one. So that actually does not surprise me that the giver was not your favorite.

Gerry: Also, I remember the [00:09:00] Bridge to Terra and being in fourth grade and they were talking about somebody getting. Hit with a shotgun. Yeah. And they're, and in fourth grade they're like, I don't know what y'all know about shotguns, but that's not one you just bounced back from. I'm in fourth grade. I'm like, oh, word.

Like, okay, 

Melanie: that's 

Gerry: actually why I should know what I feel like I shouldn't know what damage, shotgun, shotgun, but dude. But no, we rather bridge Sara in fourth grade. And my teacher was like, yo. Like, y'all think that don't mean nothing because it's in a book, but that would actually like, do some damage for real.

I'm like, alright. 

Andrea: The only traumatizing one I read in elementary school was, um, where the Red Fern grows. Did you gosh, read that one. I 

Melanie: can't watch that movie or anything. I cry and cry. That's, that's the saddest thing I've ever heard. 

Andrea: It's so sad. Jerry, you never read that one. 

Gerry: No. 

Andrea: Oh, Jerry, you gotta read it and just get ready to have your heart [00:10:00] broken.

It's the saddest book and the movie, like I, I still remember sitting in class and them describing one of the scenes and being so horrified because I think it was like the first time there was any kind of violence really described in a book that we read in class. And it was, um, fair, fairly mortifying actually.

Um, so now what was Jerry, a big reader growing up? Because we've been talking a little bit about books and his desire to like read more and all of that. Um, was he, was he one for reading back in the day? 

Melanie: He liked to read a little bit, but I think he liked to have the books more. Well, he had a ton of books.

We had a lot of books. He would read some, but I don't, I'm not sure he ever completed any, but he sure loved to read, I mean, collect the books and buy the books. So we go to book fairs and buy books, bookstores, uh, 

Theme: yeah, 

Melanie: but I don't think he read 'em all. Kinda like today he's probably [00:11:00] got a million books and I'm not sure if he is read all of those.

Gerry: That's two people came outta their own business. 

Melanie: You're my business. You're my 

Andrea: business. Jerry. Jerry, wasn't there a book that you started like a few months ago that you were like, I'm gonna finish that book. What was it? Do you remember? I feel like we talked about it on here and you were like, no. Yeah. I'm gonna finish this book.

Gerry: The one I did finish is, uh oh. What was it? The, the borrowed life of Frederick Fife. Oh, I can't remember the name of the person who wrote it was good. I, the other ones can't remember, 

Andrea: didn't, didn't finish 

Gerry: the next closest one. I read a couple comic books. I read Daredevil, um, I read a quarter in a day, like a quarter of Matt Michael Ding's book.

The uh, 

Andrea: yeah, 

Gerry: the sticky notes. I think I, yes. I like power. Read that before we had him on. I 

Andrea: feel like there's been other ones that you had, you had started, but I, I mean, 

Gerry: no, the other ones was cooked. [00:12:00] 

Andrea: I feel kind of the same way though, that like, I love buying books. Like I have at least three or four books that I've purchased and are just sitting there right now because I'm waiting for the right moment to like really hit and a moment where I have both like the right amount of energy.

'cause if I can, if I'm too low energy, I can't read. I just sit and watch tv. But then if I have too much energy, I'm like, I don't wanna sit still right now. I got stuff, I got projects, I got stuff to do. So it's gotta be like that, right? Medium level energy, which Jerry, maybe that's your problem. You're just an energetic boy.

It's hard for you to sit still. 

Gerry: You know what's gonna be hilarious if I don't know which si if this, the episode's gonna come out right before your book or right after your book. I'm gonna have your book sitting there with all the stuff that I haven't read, but I'm be like, I have it. You know 

Andrea: what, I'll the book.

I appreciate the support. I appreciate the support because let me tell you this week, so I, let me just say, first of all, [00:13:00] I, so my book is, it comes out officially on May 5th, so it will be officially out when this, when this airs. Um, and my husband, Steven, really, really wanted me to do something to commemorate it.

He's like, you should do a book signing. At least do like a book release, party book signing stuff. I did not want to do it for whatever. Re like, I don't mind selling tickets to a comedy show. I don't mind like talking about like the comedy stuff. It felt weird to schedule and host like a book signing, book release party type thing.

But I'm like, okay, fine, I'll do it. So I do it, and then I put these little like invites in my coworker's boxes because I work at a college and like they, everyone's always like inviting each other to stuff. And I would say about half of them ended up back in my box. Like they took them out of their box, put 'em back into my box, and one was sitting in the trash, like at the top of the pile of trash.

And I was like. Wow. This is why I don't wanna do these things like, so uncomfortable. And it's tonight, I [00:14:00] have no idea who is coming. No clue. Um, it's one of those things where it's almost like you kind of hope nobody comes. You can just go home. Like one of them, like, I just wanna wear comfortable pants and eat tacos right now.

I don't wanna go and, and have to be like, let's celebrate me. Like, that feels weird to me. So. You sitting there having my book at some point next to you, but not reading it. That's actually in my, in my comfort zone, Jerry. So that's fine. The beginnings of the chapters have funny stories though, so maybe you could read one of them and then you could pretend like you read the whole thing.

Gerry: It's gonna be more expensive coaster. 

Andrea: Oh, it's not. I'll play an expensive, but what if I charge like textbook? Textbook amounts. I'm like, I'm sorry, it's gonna be $120 for this book because, you know, like, I'm a college professor. It's a textbook now, bud. Like, I don't have to start charging premium. It's like 20, 25 bucks on Amazon, guys, just fyi, it's, 

Gerry: it's my coloring book.

Andrea: Oh my gosh. Is it really, 

Gerry: I don't want [00:15:00] people on Amazon. I want people to buy it from me. 

Melanie: Yeah, and I hadn't bought it yet, so 

Andrea: I was gonna say, do you have that, Ms. Patoka? Do you have his 

Melanie: color book? I don't yet because I'm a public school teacher in South Carolina and the pay, you know, I need to eat instead of color.

So maybe one day he, he might gift me one for Mother's Day or something. Oh, 

Gerry: you can do, you gonna do, 

Melanie: I was gonna say, 

Andrea: Jerry, you could give it, you could give it to her for Mother's Day. 

Gerry: That's a good plan actually, because these cost like three. 

Melanie: You better not say that on here. You're not gonna get anybody to buy it for 25.

Andrea: Exactly. 

Melanie: You better edit that part of that. 

Gerry: I say three. I meant 24. 

Andrea: Yeah, that's right. You're only netting a dollar off of each and every book. Listen, 

Gerry: I don't get that. I don't get a good private return from Amazon. 

Andrea: I neither do I. Uh, I people don't know this. Also with, with books like these that are like, from an actual publisher, I make about $3 a book.

Melanie: Oh. [00:16:00] 

Andrea: Yeah. And let me tell you, I worked for two years on this book. 

Melanie: Yeah, it kind of makes you wonder. 

Andrea: And yeah, and I've always heard authors say that too, where they're like, oh, you know, if you want to write a book, you have to really, really love to write. And I thought that was just because of the writing process.

No, no, no. It's because the financial compensation is not going to be why you write another book. Mm-hmm. Like I finished this book and somebody said, well, your next book. And I was like, no, no, no, no, no. I did it. I feel the same way about my book as I do about the fact I ran a marathon. I did it and And now we're good.

Melanie: Yeah. 

Andrea: Now we're set and we're good. Maybe I'll do a coloring book like Jerry. Yeah, that seems like a little bit more my speed. Um. Okay, so Jerry, obviously it seems like was, um, really entertaining to have in class, but were you surprised when he decided to go and pursue comedy? 

Melanie: Um, no, not really. He's always been really funny and, you know, he's just had that [00:17:00] natural funniness to him.

I was worried that having to come up with things to be funny about compared to just his natural personality, that that would be hard. But you know, that's, it's his path and, and I'm really proud of him and he's done very well, um, from what I expected him to do, you know, so I, I'm really proud of him. 

Andrea: You know, it's funny you mention that because I do think that is actually the hardest part for a lot of people who are naturally funny.

Like Jerry is legitimately a hilarious person. Mm-hmm. Just to, like, you just sit in a room with him and he'll say some wild stuff and he'll have you cracking up. And you're right that you can't, it's not the same when you go on stage you, because it's a difference of like being able to dialogue with someone and then they're really quick-witted and they can riff versus them going up there and having to have something prepared and have like everything kind of orchestrated so that it's like all the [00:18:00] lines are gonna hit just right.

Wow. And that is the hardest part I think, especially for people who are so naturally funny, is normally they don't even have to work at it and people are cracking up. And doing standup. You, you do like, you have to like craft it in in a certain type of way. Um, okay. So we, we have more questions for you, but we are gonna take a quick break.

Um, and we will be right back.

Gerry: Have you ever wondered what I would say if my mother and my administrators weren't watching every single 

Andrea: thing I do on social media? Well, that's exactly what my standup show is, and I'm gonna be coming to a town near you super soon. You can get tickets@educatorandrea.com slash tickets. Welcome back, teacher besties.

Um, so Jerry, is your workspace clear now? He was guys, he was getting distracted by his toys. So is it now they're they're 

Gerry: everywhere. I ain't even show you Captain America right here. 

Andrea: Oh, I thought it was just Spider-Man in front of you 

Gerry: have 

[00:19:00] Captain 

Gerry: America. Look, look, I just got this one. I got on stand.

Andrea: Huh? 

Gerry: I got, I got Darth Vader. 

Andrea: Oh. Oh, there you go. 

Gerry: Yeah. 

Andrea: Nah. 

Gerry: Yeah. I'm really cool 

Andrea: that the Darth Vader actually looks really nice. It looks like a fancier one somehow. Is it on an actual stand? 

Gerry: Yeah. I got like a pack of like 12 stands on Amazon 

Andrea: so you can stand your dolls up while you're doing your, your podcasting.

Gerry: I like, I don't like this anymore. 

Andrea: This isn't fun anymore. 

Gerry: I tell, I got, I gotta get bullied on the camera. I gotta get bullied while I'm not on the camera. 

Andrea: Yeah. Yeah, that's, that's exactly it. So now I imagine that Jerry probably has provided some entertainment for you over the years. Is there any stories that you remember from his days in school as a student that stand out to you as particularly funny or something that makes you be like, that's [00:20:00] just, that's Jerry right there.

Melanie: To admit it. My memory's really bad, but I do, I just remember, you know, he was into everything. Uh, he was always a good kid. He was my first one, so he didn't get into a lot of stuff. Um, he always had to have a costume. He was always doing something. Now I know he's got some really funny, 

Gerry: can we clarify that?

Grew out of that costume thing. Like, I don't, don't lie Jerry people thinking I was, I was like, I was like 16 and people were like, there's that bad guy who dresses up as Dr. Strange, like I wanna clarify. Like, 

Melanie: okay, 

Gerry: these aren't things I can remember. Well, 

Melanie: how old were you? It was only several years ago when I bought you that life lifesaver for Christmas.

It didn't have a costume with it, but I still 

Gerry: have, it's on 

Melanie: the wall. Yeah, so, so he's still getting parts of costumes, but, um, 

Gerry: oh, it's mounted. 

Melanie: Uh, Jerry just says he's just always been funny and says a lot [00:21:00] of different things that are just funny. Um, 

Andrea: yeah, 

Melanie: I'm trying to think. I don't think a lot of stuff in school.

I know, you know, he played a couple of parts in school. He was Elvis one time you were Santa Claus and you could see his, you know, funny side. His, his, uh. Love for, I guess, acting and putting on a show when he was in elementary school. Did you do, was it, did you do a snowman too, or was it just Santa Claus and Elvis?

Gerry: I don't remember doing Elvis. I think you made that one up. 

Melanie: I could have sworn you did a Elvis one. 

Gerry: I did. I did Frosty the Snowman. I did Santa Claus, 

Melanie: so it 

Gerry: was from Steven. Well, let's also clarify that this wasn't like acting. This was, I stood and like did a little twirl during the chorus concert in costume.

That was all I was doing. 

Melanie: But he, we kept him, he repeated fourth grade, uh, preschool because he was not very [00:22:00] social. He wasn't, um, you know, I didn't think he was ready to go on to kindergarten because he just didn't get a lot involved. And then all of a sudden, you know, here he turns out like he does. Not afraid to talk to people or do things.

You know, in high school he sends us this picture and he doesn't have a shirt on. He is all painted up at the high school football game. Um, and he was on TV one time. What were you doing? Yeah. Was it, or just the newscast. Remember that? Was that when you had your shirt off? Oh. Oh, I wish I could, um. 

Gerry: At State.

Melanie: Oh, okay. Do we 

Andrea: have access to these photos to share, to share with our audience? Because I think that would be magical to get the picture of high school Jerry all painted up. 

Melanie: I have tons of pictures. I've just got like 20,000 or so on my phone. I do remember. 

Andrea: Nice. 

Melanie: He [00:23:00] had surgery. Um, what year was that you had surgery?

Gerry: 2020. 

Melanie: Oh, when he came out of that surgery, he. His backside was showing he was laughing and having a good time with the nurses to the point where me and his grandmother were very embarrassed, but I've got pictures of his end hanging out of his gown. Um, and he was just send 

Andrea: that on over. Yeah, let's get that on the PO

Melanie: is, he does a lot of things, um, and just can't think of them all. But 

Andrea: do you remember. Do you remember anything specifically he said when he came outta surgery? 

Gerry: No, 

Melanie: I can't repeat 

Andrea: Jerry. I 

love 

Melanie: it on 

Andrea: Jerry. What'd you say to those poor nurses? Was it, was it wisdom teeth or was it something else? 

Gerry: No, it was kidney had like major kidney surgery.

Andrea: Whoa. 

Gerry: We can't repeat it because I, I still, I still have a job. [00:24:00] It's bad. It sounded bad. 

Melanie: Yeah, it did. 

Andrea: That's pretty brutal. Oh, man, 

Gerry: I didn't know what I was saying. 

Andrea: I mean yeah, bad enough that your mom and grandma were like, maybe he shouldn't be talking as much. Yeah. We're just like, sorry, 

Melanie: it's medication.

Thank goodness. 

Andrea: Oh my gosh. Well, you'll, you'll have to tell me, um, later, Jerry, the, the things that you, that you said to the nurses now, have you been to any of Jerry's shows? 

Melanie: Yeah. Too many. Yes. I'm kind of scared to answer. You say 

Andrea: too many? 

Melanie: Yeah. I like going to his shows, but he, um, he doesn't want me there all the time.

I don't think. Because I, I tend to, she, 

Gerry: she jumps and she'll laugh before I've said the joke because she's heard them all. And I'm like, mom, I've got, I, I do the same jokes every time I step out. 

Melanie: Like, yeah, 

Gerry: there, there's not much change time to time. Like you got to weigh a year or two apart to see [00:25:00] anything substantially different.

And she'll start laughing and she could be. The back corner of the room. It don't matter how big the room is. I'm like, I can hear her like she's right in the front. Like it's just loud. And I'm like, yo, I, I can't do this. 

Andrea: Does it throw you Jerry 

Gerry: sometimes like Yeah. Like you ever have somebody, it'd be like if somebody sitting in the front and they guess your punchline, you're like, I dunno how to ignore that.

Andrea: Yeah. Or they 

Gerry: like. Like last night I had this drunk guy sitting right in front of me when I was, and he would just start laughing in the middle of a sentence and I'm like, this is what my mom does. 

Andrea: It does, 

Gerry: does laugh in the middle of a sentence. 

Andrea: I mean, it does throw you a little bit. I think I've had some people like that or the really delay laugh where everyone stops laughing and then that like that one single person will start laughing.

That a lot of times will get me like where I'm like, I've already started to move on. And then I [00:26:00] hear them laugh from the previous joke and I can't stay focused at all. I also will say like, my parents haven't come to any of my shows 'cause I was working on my bits and I wasn't sure how I would feel about my parents hearing some of my jokes.

'cause some of them are a little bit blue. Um, and uh, so they, they haven't, they kind of got, um, uninvited to come the first like year of my shows and now I think this summer they're probably gonna come to a show. But I was like, I can't have you there because the thought of how, like, number one, my dad is a, a clap laugher.

Do have you guys ever been around? Somebody who like, they'll like, ha ha ha. And you'll hear like a clap. As part of the laugh, and if I heard that in the middle of my set, I just know, I would be like, oh, my dad's over there. I don't think I could, I could lock in and focus or, and some of the jokes, I don't, I just dunno how I, I mean, now I've done it enough, I feel like I could do it with them in the room.

But initially I was like, I know I would feel weird with, with some of the [00:27:00] jokes. So you 

Gerry: gotta put 'em in the back of the room. 

Andrea: For sure. Well, okay, so last year I had all of my siblings there, so, and their spouses all came, and I sat them in the back at this booth and in this room in San Diego, the way they have it set up, like the room isn't that deep, but it's ki it's kind of a wider room.

And the booth that they were at, for whatever reason had a light on it. So all I could see in the whole room was my youngest brother. And I was like trying so hard. Not to look at him because he's like eight years younger than me and all that. And he is, I think, probably the most honest about stuff. So if he didn't think something was laughing, he was, he was gonna give me zero pity laughs.

Um, and I just like, I had to like completely ignore the fact that he was over there in the back of the room. It was pretty bad. Um, so. Now, Ms. Toka, have you gone with family members to any of Jerry's shows? Like did [00:28:00] you bring his brother as well? 

Melanie: Um, we went, let's see, we went to one in Rochester when we went at Christmas.

And my other son and my daughter-in-law, they went, we've had her family go with some, his grandparents. Um, let's see. There was somebody else, uh, 

Gerry: they, they saw me open for Gasper. 

Melanie: Yeah. 

Gerry: We did at, got at the Carlson. 

Andrea: Okay. 

Melanie: Yeah. 

Andrea: Nice. How long ago was that? 

Gerry: It was Thanksgiving of, uh, 2024. 

Melanie: Yeah. 

Andrea: Okay. So a few. So I think that would would've predated teacher's lounge and, and all that.

So that was a while back? Yes. Yeah. Nice. So, oh my, yeah. I 

Melanie: joyous shows, but when I do, I mean, I, I like to think that he would. He would appreciate me laughing 'cause he, that would show that I approve of his jokes, you know? And yeah, and I'm his biggest fan for being there. But, um, [00:29:00] I'm trying to learn not to laugh, um, just so I won't embarrass him.

And there are so many history, I'm just not with the times or know what he's talking about. So some of them, I just, I can't laugh and it just kind of throws me off. I think the one 

Andrea: you can say they're not funny. Some of his jokes aren't funny, so you don't laugh at those ones. And that's fair. Well, that's all right.

Your 

Gerry: fans thought they were 

Melanie: the ones that I really don't laugh at. I think I really don't understand what he's talking about. Um, because like he did one on Beding. That's fair. I don't know anything about bedding, so I didn't know what the terminology meant and I, I, the joke just went over my head, but some of his jokes Gotcha.

I find really funny. And I can't help but just start laughing 'cause I know what he's gonna say. I think the one thing, yeah, 

Gerry: some of 'em do suck. Yeah. Like, I'm well aware when I say some of them, I'm like, this sucks. But I just kind dunno what to say. I'm saying, 

Andrea: I [00:30:00] mean, I feel like every, every comedian has a couple jokes.

They're like, I'll do it, but I don't love it. Like, well you kind, I know it needs to be worked. Done. 

Melanie: You try, you know, just to see, because I tend to laugh at. Some really stupid stuff and he thinks that all the jokes I try and, you know, tell him or something to make a joke about. He's like, that's not funny.

I'm like, okay, well 

Andrea: Jerry, how dare you? 

Gerry: But I'm not funny. Some of 'em be terrible. 

Melanie: I think the, 

Gerry: she, she did, I'll give her credit. I don't have it with me, but she get, she told me something to do with one of my stickers and I just got the sticker like two hours ago. And it's on one of my jokes about me shaving my head and how I chose to be bald.

I'm pro-choice, right? And the sticker says pro-choice and has like a gif of somebody shaving their head 

Melanie: that was on me, 

Gerry: and she came up with that. 

Andrea: I love it. That's, that's such a, that's such a fun play on it. That's, that's great. The 

Melanie: one thing 

Andrea: I, so now where do you think, so 

Gerry: we're [00:31:00] like one for eight.

Andrea: She's like, well, I don't know about that. I know 

Melanie: that might be 

Andrea: true. Where do you think, where, where, where do you think that, um, Jerry got his sense of humor from? 

Melanie: I don't know. 

Gerry: God, 

Melanie: it has to be because neither, not me or his dad. Uh, 

Gerry: no, no. My family's funny. 

Andrea: Really? 

Gerry: No, I, no on i'll, I told him this and I've told them this.

I think my brother's, the only one of the few people I met was funnier than me. And 'cause he don't, he, he, he don't really do jokes. He'll just say the right thing or he'll, he'll do stuff in a funny way. And it's like he sometimes he don't even talk and he is being funny and he is the only person probably in my family who like, made me laugh, laugh, like, like, like cry.

Feel like I was gonna pass out because he just did something and like that second. 

Andrea: Interesting. [00:32:00] Well, we gotta bring him on one of these days. 

Melanie: Exactly. Because when they get to going at each other, it, you can see where it comes from. 

Gerry: He hates attention. 

Melanie: Yeah. 

Gerry: Because I've tried to be like, some of this stuff you do you need to be doing on the internet.

Andrea: Yeah. 

Gerry: Because it will. It'll 

Andrea: pop off. 

Gerry: Yeah. And he don't wanna do it. I'm like, man. Yeah. And I'm trying to piggyback off of it like I do y'all. I'm like, yo, 

Andrea: you need to, to blow up. I need you to blow up so I can just ride those coattails and, and get to it. And if you met Chase, oh my gosh, 

Melanie: him and Jerry are, you would think they're probably opposites, but then there's, there's so much alike in so many ways.

But Chase is the one who owns the Spider-Man costume today. And. Climbed up the wall at Thanksgiving one time, and when we went to, um, oh, what was the place we went with all the waterfalls? He, uh, well he didn't wear it there, but he let his brother-in-law wear it, so we 

Gerry: Oh, he wore the [00:33:00] Niagara Falls? 

Melanie: No. Did he?

No. Ryan wore it when we went and Ryan went around and, yeah. Took pictures. But he, he owns the, I think he ended up giving it to Ryan though. But they're both huge Spider-Man fans too, so they are a lot alike in so many ways. But he is funny too. Oh my gosh. But just very laid back. 

Andrea: Gotcha. Okay. Now what's the age difference?

Melanie: Three and a half years. Two and a half years. Two 

Andrea: and 

and 

Melanie: a half years. 

Andrea: Gotcha. 

Melanie: Yeah, he's 

Andrea: younger. Okay. Yeah. Well, now is he, is he more introverted? 

Melanie: Yeah, I think so. Okay. Yeah. Now if you get him talking about something he's passionate about or if he's upset, well, he cannot talk everybody. You can't get a word in, but he and Jerry have always been a lot alike with sports and things like that.

But they're competitive too. Yeah. And don't get 'em started on a catchphrase because it, it'll never go away. 

Andrea: Are there, are there specific [00:34:00] ones that come to mind as far as like catchphrases that they, he 

Gerry: started calling me little man about two years ago. 

Melanie: It, it they, 

Gerry: and I don't like it. 

Melanie: I went to pick 

Gerry: up, 'cause I try and call him a little man and we'll just go, nah, you too little, little man.

And we'll do, I mean 30 minutes at chunks. We'll just go back and forth. And he gets everybody to agree with him that I'm the little man. I'm like, no, this is stupid. I like this. I, 

Melanie: I, I can't go. I went to pick up my taxes the other day and Jerry was in the car and I told Chase, I said, okay, I'm, I'm gonna let you talk to your brother a minute.

I got to go in. They had been little manning down the highway and I came out, they still little manned each other to about 15 minutes away where we were going to eat. And we're like, okay, we gotta go now. I, I just, I can't do it. That's all they do. But I will tell you one of the funniest things, and I still think it's funny and I do have pictures, is we went up there Christmas, we were up there for two weeks and [00:35:00] Sarah had gone somewhere.

So it was me and chasing Jerry. We were on the couch watching TV and one was on one on the floor down beside me, and Jerry was on the other side, and I had gummy bears and it was a gummy bear war. Give me a gummy bear, gummy bear me please. And they were sending me texts, making means about gummy bears, saying it in different languages, and they just kept going back and forth at each other with gummy bears.

I don't know if I've laughed that hard in a long time, but for both of them, just to come up with different gummy bear things, it 

Gerry: was hilarious. 

Melanie: I have to see if I can, oh my gosh. A picture. But it's, it's stuff, yeah. All kinds of. Phrases and they just don't stop saying them and it'll go on for months and months.

And then a new one will come about and that one's forgotten. And here we go with a new phrase and they just keep going and going and it's awful. 

Andrea: [00:36:00] Oh my gosh. I was gonna say, I'm so sorry. That's like, as a bystander, it sounds like a nightmare. Yes. The people involved. Yeah. 

Gerry: Andrew, do your kids rock with SpongeBob?

Andrea: Uh, a li Yeah, they like it. 

Gerry: They came out with that SpongeBob movie back about Christmas. Yeah. And I think it was Ice Spice wrote the song for it. Ugh. 

Andrea: Yeah. 

Gerry: And we would just play the Ice Spice SpongeBob song.

Andrea: Guys, if you don't, if, if you're not watching, she just shared a picture of a gigantic gummy bear hugging. Sherry, 

Melanie: um, 

Andrea: wow. 

Melanie: Here's one from Chase. If you can see his t-shirt, I would like a gummy bear, please. And it's real 

Andrea: Oh 

Melanie: my gosh. Pictures and they know how to change them to have this gummy bear stuff. I don't even know how they do it, but 

Andrea: Oh my gosh.[00:37:00] 

It's hilarious. I love it. That's so funny. Um, okay, before we let your mom go, Jerry, do you have anything else that you wanna ask her or have her share? I.

He is. You could tell he is like, I don't, I don't. Um, Ms. Patoka, happy Mother's Day. Thank you so much for, um, being here with us and hanging out with us. It was super fun. 

Melanie: It was. 

Andrea: So again, thank you so much Ms. Patoka. This was super, super fun. Um, and guys, if you have thoughts about what we chatted about today, um, or you have questions for us, you can contact us, andrea@humancontent.com, or you can contact me at Educator Andrea and you can contact Jerry at.

Gerry: Hey, comedy by GP on Instagram and TikTok. 

Andrea: That's right. And if you wanna contact the whole Human Content Podcast family, you can do so on Instagram and TikTok at Human Content Pods. If you wanna check out those full video episodes, they're up every week on YouTube at [00:38:00] Educator. Andrea, thank you so much for listening.

I'm your host, Andrea Forke. 

Gerry: I'm Jerry Patoka. 

Andrea: And our guest today was Miss Melanie Patoka, and our executive producers are Andrew Ham, Aron Korney, Rob Goldman and Shanti Brook. Our editor is Andrew Sims. Our engineer is Jason Portizo. Our music is by Omer Ben-Zvi. To learn more about how to survive the classrooms program, just.

Kleer and ethics policy and submission verification and licensing terms. You can go to podcaster andrea.com. How to Survive Classroom is a human content production.

Gerry: I can't do this, the podcast with the Spiderman that close. Have you noticed me pick them up and I'm just looking down on cruise with I didn't know you, the Spiderman. I, I keep picking this one up. I keep playing. Okay. 

Andrea: Thank you so much for watching. Want more of how to survive the classroom? You can watch more episodes right now.

Just click on that little box over [00:39:00] there, you see it, and if you haven't yet, please subscribe. Okay, bye.